Ren and Stimpy: Dead Parrot

A customer (played by Ren) enters a pet shop.
Ren: Hello, I wish to register a complaint.
(The owner, Stimpy does not respond.)
Ren: Hello, Miss?
Stimpy: Uhh, what do you mean "miss"?
Ren: Sorry, I have a cold. I wish to make a complaint!
Stimpy: Oh, uh, we're closin' for lunch.
Ren: Forget that, man. I wish to complain about this parrot that I purchased not half an hour ago from this same store.
Stimpy: Oh yes, the, uh, the Norwegian Blue...What's,uh...What's wrong with it?
Ren: Oh, I'll tell you what's wrong with it, man. IiiiiIIIIT'S DEAD! DEAD, YOU EEDIOT! THAT'S WHAT'S WRONG WITH IT!
Stimpy: No, no, he's uh,...he's just uh... resting! Yeah, that's it!
Ren: Look, man, I know a dead parrot when I see one, and I'm looking at one right now.
Stimpy: No no he's not dead, he's, he's resting! Remarkable bird, the Norwegian Blue, isn't it, huh? Beautiful plumage!
Ren: The plumage doesn't matter. It's stone dead.
Stimpy: Nononono, no, no! He's resting!
Ren: *pause for a sec* All right then, if he's REALLY resting, I'll just wake him up! (shouting at the cage) Hello, Meester Polly Parrot! I've got a nice fresh cuttlefish for you if you show...
(Stimpy hits the cage)
Stimpy: There, he moved!
(Ren slaps Stimpy)
Ren: No, he didn't, you feelthy worm, that was just you hitting the cage!
Stimpy: I didn't!!
Ren: Yes, you did, you stupid fathead!
Stimpy: I never, never did anything...
Ren: (yelling and hitting the cage repeatedly) HELLO POLLY!!!!! Testing! Testing! Testing! Testing! This is your nine o'clock alarm call!
(Takes parrot out of the cage and thumps its head on the counter, then on Stimpy's head. Throws it up in the air and watches it plummet to the floor.)
Ren: Now that's what I call a dead parrot.
Stimpy: No, no.....No, he's uh... Stunned!
Ren: STUNNED?!?
Stimpy: Yeah! You stunned him, just as he was waking up! Norwegian Blues stun easily.
Ren: Now look here, man, I've definitely had enough of this. That parrot is definitely deceased, and when I purchased it not half an hour ago, you assured me that its total lack of movement was due to it being tired and worn out following a prolonged squawk.
Stimpy: Well, he's...he's, ah...probably pining for the fjords.
Ren: PINING for the FJORDS?!?!?!? What the heck kind of reediculous talk is that? Look, why did he fall flat on his back the moment I threw him in the air? He fell flat on his back when I took him home as well!
Stimpy: The Norwegian Blue prefers lying on it's back! Remarkable bird, isn't it, sir-uh? Lovely plumage!
Ren: Look, I took the liberty of examining that parrot when I got it home, and I discovered the only reason that it had been sitting on its perch in the first place was that it had been NAILED there. Probably even by you! What kind of a sick leetle monkey are you?!!?
(pause)
Stimpy: Well, of course it was nailed there! If I hadn't nailed that bird down, it would have nuzzled up to those bars, bent them apart with its beak, and VOOM! Feeweeweewee!
Ren: "VOOM"?!? Leesten man, this stupid bird wouldn't "voom" if you put four million volts through it! He's bleeding demised!
Stimpy: No no! He's pining!
(At this point, Ren goes on another one of his psycotic rants)
Ren: He's not pinin'! *slams the cage he's holding down* He's passed on! This parrot is no more! He has ceased to be! He's expired and gone to meet his maker! He's a stiff! Bereft of life, he rests in peace! If you hadn't nailed him to the perch he'd be pushing up the daisies! His metabolic processes... are now- HISTORY!!! He's off the twig! He's kicked the bucket, he's shuffled off his mortal coil, run down the curtain and joined the bleeding choir invisibile!! *begins beating the parrot against Stimpy's head as he shouts out each of the following words* THIS! IS! AN! EX-! PARROT!!! *throws the parrot against Stimpy's face*
(pause)
Stimpy: Well, I'd better replace it, then. (he takes a quick peek behind the counter)
Ren: (to audience) If you want something done in this country, you've got to complain until you're blue to the mouth.
Stimpy: (returns to the front) Sorry sir-uh, I've had a look around the back of the shop, and uh, we're out of parrots.
Ren: I see. I see, I get the picture.
Stimpy: I got a slug.
(pause)
Ren: Well, does it talk?
Stimpy: Nnnnot really.
Ren: WELL IT'S HARDLY A BLOODY REPLACEMENT, IS IT?!!???!!?
Stimpy: N-no, I guess not.

This is a pic that requested me to do: A Ren & Stimpy re-enactment of the Dead Parrot sketch from Monty Python's Flying Circus. Since I like Monty Python, & since I hadn't drawn Ren & Stimpy in a long time, I thought, "Why not?" So, I hope you like it, dude.

In case you're wondering what's up with the pic, I used a tablet to draw it. For those who didn't know, I recently got a tablet & decided to try it out on a picture, & I chose to do this one with it. Note also that this isn't the only time I used Ren & Stimpy with art software for the first time. My first Paint Shop Pro pic was an iPod parody of Ren & Stimpy. Isn't that something?

Can you spot the partially seen bag of Gritty Kitty in this pic?

Ren & Stimpy (c) John Kricfalusi
Monty Python (c) themselves
Dead Parrot sketch (c) Monty Python
Art & any changes made to sketch (c) me